Manbag: woe

I gave in. I’ve been fed up of cramming stuff into my pockets, so I’ve only gone and brought a bloody manbag. At least that’s what I think it is. It was in the men’s section in Next, so I’m assuming this is what it is. And it’s a good size, not like one of those rubbish purse-like things that I always assumed were portable washbags.

And not only have I brought one, I’ve been using it. And finding it useful. It even has compartments. Bloody compartments for Christ’s sake.

I’m worried what this says about me now. Does it now mean that I’ve finally crashed the line from occasional media tosser into fullblown media wanker? Does it mark me out as a radiohead fan? Does it imply that I’m one of those men who is so concerned with bulging pockets that he can’t cope without a bloody bag? A bag with compartments, if I hadn’t already mention that. And does it make my bum look big?

The answer to all of the above, I think, is probably yes.

Face it, I’d probably be a metrosexual by now if it wasn’t for the fact:

  1. I have ginger stubble
  2. I wouldn’t know a cologne if it sprayed itself on my nose
  3. I don’t like wearing suits
  4. I know nothing about branded clothing
  5. I’d still rather watch football than go to the theatre
  6. I don’t like cocktails
  7. I’m far too ugly
  8. I don’t know what a metrosexual is

On the flipside, I’m not a particularly bloke-like bloke. I can cook, iron, clean the house, really despise those WKD adverts. I’m sure there are other things but I can’t think of them. actually, I’ve now panicked myself into thinking I’m far too blokey and am probably the equivalent of a knuckle-dragging sexist version of early man.

London can do strange things to a chap though. If you told me a year ago I’d be buying a bag – with compartments, no less – I’d have stuck it over my head in shame.

UPDATE: I’ve just been informed my the girls in the office that I’ve not purchased a manbag. According to them I have a masculine-orientated unisex bag. However, it’s been countered by another colleague than, as it was purchased from a menswear department, it should come under the category of manbag. Maybe it’s a Bag For Men rather than a Manbag? Is there a difference? Are there any other names for it? I’m confused. And just slightly relieved.


4 Responses to “Manbag: woe”

  1. 1 Matt June 26, 2008 at 9:16 am

    I’m hugely relieved that having ginger stubble excludes a fellow from metrosexuality, champ. I think having ginger hair altogether sorts that. But we all know that my hair’s about the most-taken care of MAN HAIR there is.

    You swear too much to be a metro, too. You’re quite passive-aggressive. You’re not exactly a pink-shirt-wearer.

    You don’t use fake tan. And you play squash. SQUASH!

    I say that earnestly. Squash is more manly than most sports.


    What’s wrong with a rucksack?

    I could justify your sensitive and thoughtful nature some more, but really? I’d not worry. It’s only a bag. It’s the thick-rimmed glasses and cardigans and Converse-when-you’re-forty that’ll really scream MEDIA BASTARD.

    There’s a lot of that in Manchester. But then, they could be graphic designers too.

  2. 2 Gary Andrews June 26, 2008 at 9:36 am

    Rucksacks are fine for carrying football and gym gear but when they contain home-made lasagne and a bottle of later it makes me look even more like a dorky geeko than usual, and I really don’t need any help in that department. Also, they make it look like my mum’s packed my lunch. Which should probably would do, if I still lived at home. Parallel universes and all that.

    You’ll be glad to know I don’t own a single cardigan.

  3. 3 selena gomez imgur girls in yoga pants reddit August 14, 2014 at 1:05 am

    What many people don’t realize is there are many more muscles
    benefiting from it. For a longer short, the Sevilla Short is a good
    option. They are application software in which generates the sheets where
    sprites are organized.

  4. 4 yogapants September 24, 2019 at 7:02 am

    I must thank you for the efforts you’ve put in writing this
    website. I am hoping to view the same high-grade blog posts from you later on as well.
    In truth, your creative writing abilities has encouraged me to get my very own site now 😉

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

RSS What I’m Twittering about

  • An error has occurred; the feed is probably down. Try again later.
June 2008

Throw letters together and send them to me

Yes, this is my name. And my email. Use it wisely or you're not getting a biscuit with your tea: garyllewellynandrews [at] gmail [dot] com

%d bloggers like this: